I want to put Jaxon in Nursery School in the new year, but when I leave the room he starts freaking out and crying. How do I help him with the seperation anxiety and myself (it is hard on me to leave him crying ).
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I suggest sending him to Utica!!! Just kidding. The staff will be trained in how to deal with this, so have no fear they will distract and redirect his attention to toys and games and he will be smiling in no time. Make sure you keep your departure brief. The longer parents drag it out, the harder it is. Feel free to call after 20 minutes and see how he is doing. A good centre will welcome your calls 2-3 times a day if it makes you feel more comfortable.
also be sure to visit the centre a few times with Jaxon to get him used to being there. He will feed off your reactions too, so go in confident and happy and show him it is OK to be there.
Also talk up his going to Nursery School as a really fun and exciting experience. Maybe get a new backpack for his belongings. Build an excitement about going.
Maybe pack a small photo album with family/pet pictures (with labels so the staff can help facilitate discussion).
My suggestion to you is small doses. The first day stay with him (if you can). The next time stay a shorter time, shorter the next and the next.
Another suggestion is to ease him into it if you want to just leave him. By that I mean, if NS is 930-1130. Take him from 930-1000, the next day extend it 10-15 mins and so on and so forth.
As for making it easy on you, yes its hard to leave your child crying in the arms of what you and him know to be a stranger but if you did your research you are leaving him in the hands of a skilled and trained loving individual that will take good care of him.
The crying on his part will stop. As will yours too. Just know that he is going to be okay. Call the centre to see how he is doing. 100 times if you have to...they understand!
Before you know it, he will be playing with new friends and he will be crying because he doesn't want to leave.
Hope that helps!
Lisa
I agree 100% with Andrea. As hard as it can be, for you more than him , don't harp on it. If you stay with him and make a big thing of it and everything, he'll learn that if he cries you'll stay. Easiest way to transition is to give him a hug and a kiss, tell him you love him and to have fun, and head on out. Although I know it's hard hearing him cry, he will be distracted in NO time at all and be doing fine. We find it quite difficult when parents stay for half an hour apologizing and hugging and following the kid around and everything else, because usually children will keep crying as long as they're getting that attention from the parents.
I have to agree with 100%. Make it brief and leave. Parents don't realize that often them staying around just make it harder. Usually after about 5 minutes, the child as already stop crying. When a child is screaming and I tell the parent just to leave their child to me and leave, either they look at me like if I was crazy or they are very relieve that they can actually leave.
Thanks for all your help ladies!!!